Creating a vision or having an idea of what sort of life would be good for us is a good goal setting exercise.
If you are reading this then it’s likely that you have had some difficulties creating a balanced life for yourself.
It’s often a difficult task to know what a balanced life might look like particularly if we have been caught up in dealing with intense situations in our family as we were growing up. There probably wasn’t much time for thinking about you and your own needs. Often our energies can get channelled into doing things that we have learnt to use to try and protect ourselves rather than feed us. Many people develop skills that they have used to keep them separate from what’s been happening around them. For example, many of us will use overwork, achievement, money making or perhaps risky behaviours and a host of other things to distract ourselves. Unfortunately, the early patterns we developed can get a grip of us and we may still be doing them now and not seeing that they perhaps no longer fit the bill.
DO YOU HAVE PEACE OF MIND?
If we want balance in our lives, then one helpful barometer we can use is to see if we have peace of mind in the activities we do.
What does Peace of Mind mean and how do we achieve it?
It means choosing options that deliver freedom from emotional turmoil and stress.
For example, if your current job is bringing you emotional turmoil and stress then maybe it is time to review your reasons for your choice of work. Check out which part of you made the job choice. Ask yourself questions – Was this job my choice or was it what my parents, teachers etc wanted me to do? Have I chosen the job from a place of wanting to impress, get more money or status or appearance and am I ignoring the impact it has on me?
If we do a job that others push us into or if we seek a job to satisfy our ego, then it won’t be long before we are feeling frazzled. Jobs need to be a good fit for us otherwise we will soon feel out of balance. If you think you are out of balance its now a matter of being very honest with yourself and challenging the parts of you that have been keeping you stuck.
Using the peace of mind test begin to look at other areas of your life.
For example, do your hobbies and activities create emotional turmoil and stress, or do they deliver Peace of Mind?
If playing hockey in league one creates tension and worry rather than enjoyment then consider dropping down a league and do it for fun and pleasure or let it go and do something that’s enjoyable and doesn’t involve a battle or self-criticism or making your life hard.
Look at what you do and how you feel during it and after it.